Bion
Diogenes Laertius, Book IV - Bion
46. Bion was by birth a citizen of Borysthenes [Olbia]; who his parents were,
and what his circumstances before he took to philosophy, he himself told
Antigonus in plain terms. For, when Antigonus inquired:
Who among men, and whence, are you? What is your city and your parents?[49]
he, knowing that he had already been maligned to the king, replied, "My father
was a freedman, who wiped his nose on his sleeve" – meaning that he was a dealer
in salt fish – "a native of Borysthenes, with no face to show, but only the
writing on his face, a token of his master's severity. My mother was such as a
man like my father would marry, from a brothel. Afterwards my father, who had
cheated the revenue in some way, was sold with all his family. And I, then a not
ungraceful youngster, was bought by a certain rhetorician, who on his death left
me all he had. 47. And I burnt his books, scraped everything together, came to
Athens and turned philosopher.
This is the stock and this the blood from which I boast to have sprung.[50]
Such is my story. It is high time, then, that Persaeus and Philonides left off
recounting it. Judge me by myself."
In truth Bion was in other respects a shifty character, a subtle sophist, and
one who had given the enemies of philosophy many an occasion to blaspheme, while
in certain respects he was even pompous and able to indulge in arrogance. He
left very many memoirs, and also sayings of useful application. For example,
when he was reproached for not paying court to a youth, his excuse was, "You
can't get hold of a soft cheese with a hook." 48. Being once asked who suffers
most from anxiety, he replied, "He who is ambitious of the greatest prosperity."
Being consulted by some one as to whether he should marry – for this story is
also told of Bion – he made answer, "If the wife you marry be ugly, she will be
your bane; if beautiful, you will not keep her to yourself."[51] He called old
age the harbour of all ills; at least they all take refuge there. Renown he
called the mother of virtues; beauty another's good; wealth the sinews of
success. To some one who had devoured his patrimony he said, "The earth
swallowed Amphiaraus, but you have swallowed your land." To be unable to bear an
ill is itself a great ill. He used to condemn those who burnt men alive as if
they could not feel, and yet cauterized them as if they could. 49. He used
repeatedly to say that to grant favours to another was preferable to enjoying
the favours of others. For the latter means ruin to both body and soul. He even
abused Socrates, declaring that, if he felt desire for Alcibiades and abstained,
he was a fool; if he did not, his conduct was in no way remarkable. The road to
Hades, he used to say, was easy to travel; at any rate men passed away with
their eyes shut. He said in censure of Alcibiades that in his boyhood he drew
away the husbands from their wives, and as a young man the wives from their
husbands. When the Athenians were absorbed in the practice of rhetoric, he
taught philosophy at Rhodes. To some one who found fault with him for this he
replied, "How can I sell barley when what I brought to market is wheat?"
50. He used to say that those in Hades would be more severely punished if the
vessels in which they drew water were whole instead of being pierced with holes.
To an importunate talker who wanted his help he said, "I will satisfy your
demand, if you will only get others to plead your cause and stay away yourself."
On a voyage in bad company he fell in with pirates. When his companions said,
"We are lost if we are discovered," "And I too," he replied, "unless I am
discovered." Conceit he styled a hindrance to progress. Referring to a wealthy
miser he said, "He has not acquired a fortune; the fortune has acquired him."
Misers, he said, took care of property as if it belonged to them, but derived no
more benefit from it than if it belonged to others. "When we are young," said
he, "we are courageous, but it is only in old age that prudence is at its
height." 51. Prudence, he said, excels the other virtues as much as sight excels
the other senses. He used to say that we ought not to heap reproaches on old
age, seeing that, as he said, we all hope to reach it. To a slanderer who showed
a grave face his words were, "I don't know whether you have met with ill luck,
or your neighbour with good." He used to say that low birth made a bad partner
for free speech, for –
It cows a man, however bold his heart.[52]
We ought, he remarked, to watch our friends and see what manner of men they are,
in order that we may not be thought to associate with the bad or to decline the
friendship of the good.
O gentle Archytas, musician-born, blessed in thine own conceit, most skilled of
men to stir the bass of strife.[54]
53. And in general he made sport of music and geometry. He lived extravagantly,
and for this reason he would move from one city to another, sometimes contriving
to make a great show. Thus at Rhodes he persuaded the sailors to put on
students' garb and follow in his train. And when, attended by them, he made his
way into the gymnasium, all eyes were fixed on him. It was his custom also to
adopt certain young men for the gratification of his appetite and in order that
he might be protected by their goodwill.[55] He was extremely selfish and
insisted strongly on the maxim that "friends share in common." And hence it came
about that he is not credited with a single disciple, out of all the crowds who
attended his lectures. And yet there were some who followed his lead in
shamelessness. 54. For instance, Betion, one of his intimates, is said once to
have addressed Menedemus in these words: "For my part, Menedemus, I pass the
night with Bion, and I don't think I am any the worse for it." In his familiar
talk he would often vehemently assail belief in the gods, a taste which he had
derived from Theodorus. Afterwards, when he fell ill (so it was said by the
people of Chalcis where he died), he was persuaded to wear an amulet and to
repent of his offences against religion. And even for want of nurses he was in a
sad plight, until Antigonus sent him two servants. And it is stated by Favorinus
in his Miscellaneous History that the king himself followed in a litter.
Even so he died, and in these lines[56] I have taken him to task:
55. We hear that Bion, to whom the Scythian land of Borysthenes gave birth,
denied that the gods really exist. Had he persisted in holding this opinion, it
would have been right to say, "He thinks as he pleases: wrongly, to be sure, but
still he does think so." But in fact, when he fell ill of a lingering disease
and feared death, he who denied the existence of the gods, and would not even
look at a temple, 56. who often mocked at mortals for sacrificing to deities,
not only over hearth and high altars and table, with sweet savour and fat and
incense did he gladden the nostrils of the gods; nor was he content to say "I
have sinned, forgive the past," 57. but he cheerfully allowed an old woman to
put a charm round his neck, and in full faith bound his arms with leather and
placed the rhamnus and the laurel-branch over the door, being ready to submit to
anything sooner than die. Fool for wishing that the divine favour might be
purchased at a certain price, as if the gods existed just when Bion chose to
recognize them! It was then with vain wisdom that, when the driveller was all
ashes, he stretched out his hand and said "Hail, Pluto, hail!"
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